INNER LIFE®
by DR. PHIL MCGRAW
Fear–of failure, of change or of disappointing others–
can cause us to make decisions that rob us of true happiness.
Here, Dr. Phil’s seven steps to finally living your passions
Have you been allowing fear to dominate your
life, why you do what you do, and even where you
do it? I’m not talking about day-to-day fears of
things like spiders, heights and public speaking;
we all have those.
What I’m talking about is the stomach-turning
realization that just about every major decision you’ve
ever made has been to please, appease or somehow
meet the needs of everyone . . . except yourself. The
settle for a “bird in the hand” you will never get the
two in the bush. I’m talking about the fact that you
will tell yourself no over and over again because
you don’t want to face the fear associated with taking a risk of falling flat on your face and thus allowing people in your life to say, “I told you so!”
Rather than possibly standing alone or having to
fight for what you truly wanted, dreamed of or
hoped for, you went along with the crowd or let
realization that you have sold out on yourself and
your dreams because you were afraid you might fail
or displease those people whose opinions you value.
I’m talking about the fact that you make decisions because you’re scared to death of what might
happen if you don’t take the safe way out. That you
will settle for what you don’t want instead of pushing for what you do want because you are afraid
you might not get it and are scared of how much
that would hurt. You are afraid that if you don’t
somebody else—maybe your spouse, parents, friends
or employers—tell you what you should like, want
or do. Peer pressure, unfortunately, is not an adoles-cent-only phenomenon. The dangerous thing about
a fear-based mind-set is that it paralyzes you and
puts you in a comfort zone that’s safe and predictable, but causes you to waste precious time in your
life on things you don’t really want. You’ve stayed
in that comfort zone, scared to death that you
would be rejected, that you would CONTINUED
FROM Real Life: Preparing for the 7 Worst Days of Your Life, BY DR. PHIL MCGRAW. COPYRIGHT 2008
